Let’s Talk About That Voice in Your Head
You know the one. It whispers at 3 a.m., right when you need rest the most. It replays the meeting where you should’ve spoken up. It forecasts worst-case scenarios like it’s auditioning for a role in a drama series.
That voice has opinions. And unfortunately, it also has stamina.
If you’ve ever found yourself stuck in the loop of “what ifs” and “what will they think,” you’re not alone. I’ve been there. The anxiety, the pressure, the feeling that somehow, despite all your accomplishments, you’re going to be found out — like a fraud who just got lucky.
This isn’t just mental noise. It’s draining. And more than that, it’s misdirected energy.
The Hidden Cost of Worry
Worry pretends to be productive. It feels like you’re doing something — preparing, analysing, being responsible. But it’s actually spinning your wheels in place.
Think about it: what else could you have done with all the hours you’ve spent second-guessing that email or replaying a presentation in your head?
That energy is real. And it has a better use.
The Shift That Changed Everything for Me
Years ago, I hit rock bottom. On the outside, I was ticking all the boxes — education, job, family. But inside? I was exhausted. Defeated. I was sitting in a chair with sleeping pills in one hand and water in the other.
The turning point came in the form of a newborn’s gaze — my daughter’s. She reminded me that I had a choice: to keep spiraling or to redirect that pain into purpose. That’s when I started to shift — not overnight, but with intent.
It wasn’t about becoming fearless. It was about becoming more powerful than my fear.
“Take all the energy you spend on…
- worrying about the past
- worrying about the future
- worrying about what others think
- worrying about if you might fail
… and channel that energy into one useful action within your control.” ~James Clear
When I first read that quote from James Clear, it stopped me cold. Not because it was brand new. But because it felt like someone had taken everything I’d been learning through my coaching journey — High Performance, Wayfinder, Imposter Syndrome-Informed, Neuro Change — and boiled it down to one simple truth:
🔁 Redirect your energy.
Worry keeps you spinning. Action keeps you growing.
Even one small move — one decision, one email, one boundary set — is a declaration. A shift from stuck to forward.
Why This Matters Especially for Women Like Us
If you’re a woman in a high-pressure, male-dominated environment, this isn’t just theory. This is your lived reality.
You’re often the only one in the room. The one who’s expected to deliver flawlessly and still prove she belongs. The one who carries the pressure to be competent, collaborative, and likable — all at once.
Layer in imposter feelings, and it’s no wonder worry becomes a default mode.
But here’s the truth that coaching has taught me — and that I now teach others:
➡️ You can be aware of those thoughts and still choose differently.
➡️ You don’t need to fix everything. You need to act on what’s yours to change.
➡️ Worry is a habit. So is confidence.
So How Do You Channel That Energy?
Here’s a practice I often share with my clients — and one I still use myself when my brain starts to spiral:
📝 The One Useful Action Prompt:
- What am I worried about right now? (Name it clearly.)
- What part of this is within my control?
- What one small action can I take today to move forward?
And then — take that step. Just one. Doesn’t have to be groundbreaking. It just has to be yours.
Your Energy is Precious. Spend It Like It Matters.
Whether you’re leading a team, planning your next move, or simply trying to hold it all together — your energy is your most valuable currency.
Don’t waste it feeding fears you’ve outgrown.
Use it to:
- Have that difficult (but honest) conversation.
- Put yourself forward for the opportunity you keep putting off.
- Say no — without apology.
- Say yes — without conditions.
One Last Thought
If you’re feeling stuck between the voice that doubts and the part of you that knows there’s more, remember this:
You don’t need to wait to feel ready. You just need to act like someone who is.
And when you do? You’ll start to believe it.
Let’s stop feeding fear.
Let’s start building forward.
What one useful action will you take today?
Remember, you can unleash your version of success.
And if you’re not sure what that looks like yet — that’s okay. Let’s find it together.
Your Coach
Stephanie
Ready to Ignite Your SPARK?
As a Certified High Performance, Wayfinder and Imposter Syndrome Informed Coach, I’m here to support you on this transformative journey. Whether it’s in your career, health, or relationships, my coaching programs are designed to help you achieve heightened and sustained levels of performance and potential. Are you ready to embrace these inner shifts then let’s embark on this journey together!
Whenever you’re ready, here are a few ways I can support you:
Join our IYS Community – to connect with like-minded individuals focused on increasing their ENGAGEMENT, CONFIDENCE & JOY in work (and life)
Access your FREE Online Training – and learn how you can immediately hit higher levels of performance and potential in all you do!
Take the High Performance Questionnaire – to understand if you’re ready to go to the next level and live a life full of engagement, joy and confidence…
Book a Chat – so we can breakthrough what you’re currently challenged with and take the next action towards living the life of your dreams!